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Bronson Bullock’s mother and father are hoping and waiting, but doctors gave them a grim assessment Wednesday. It appears the stroke inflicted brain damage, and Bronson might not be able to see, walk or speak.

The parents said doctors gave them two choices: turn off the heart/lung machine that helps keep Bronson alive or wait to see if he can recover.

“We’re we still hoping for more time for his brain to heal some of those injuries, and then we can get a second or third opinion,” said Bronson’s father, Mario Bullock.

The outpouring

The devastating news came in the wake of a high point in Bronson’s lifelong struggle. It happened Sunday at the Mocha Moment coffee shop in Janesville.

Mario was a regular at the shop, often taking their daughter Zoë there before school, said the children’s mother, Sarah Corey.

Mocha Moment offered to do a fundraiser, and lines went down the street for the event Sunday morning. The shop donated all its proceeds, and nearly $6,500 was raised, the most successful fundraiser the community-minded shop has held, Sarah was told.

While Sarah stayed with Bronson at Children’s Hospital of Wisconsin Milwaukee, Mario worked the drive-up window. He found himself consoling women who came to offer their cash and comfort. Some were bawling.

One woman who didn’t know the family drove from Fond du Lac, a testament to the power of social media, Sarah said.

Mario, a Chicago native who has lived here for 11 years, said the outpouring of support blew him away. He was still choking up when he talked about it Thursday.

Mario has worked on fundraisers for the local National Association for Mental Illness chapter, where he was board president, And he tried to mobilize support when he ran for county board in 2018, but he had never seen such community spirit, and he is sure he wouldn’t have gotten it in his hometown.

After the fundraiser, Mario posted a video in which he talked to the community: “I know there’s a lot of negativity and hate in the world right now, but if it takes a 3-year-old boy to get people to come together for something positive, then I want everybody to take that to heart. Don’t believe what they say about ‘we’re not all in this together’ because today just taught me something very important: No matter what’s going on in your life, you do have support, no matter what.”

The costs

Sarah, a 2004 Parker High School grad, is a medical assistant at Mercyhealth North in Janesville. She has insurance to cover Bronson’s treatment, which she expects will run into the millions of dollars, but the couple will shoulder a share of medical costs.

Mario, a bartender at drafthouse in Janesville, said he knew this was coming, so he paid off his bills and socked away money earlier this year, but that money will soon run out. He’s not sure he wants to take donations to help him pay his bills, however.

“I feel bad. I never had people help me out like this before. It’s just huge,” he said.

The beginning

Sarah’s and Mario’s decision is something no one should have to face.

“How can you live with yourself if you can’t talk to your 3-year-old and not know if he’s in pain?” Mario said. “How fair is that for me as a parent to do that to my son, to have him struggle and me not know exactly what’s going on with him?

But for the moment, the parents have decided to go with their first decision, made when Bronson was still in utero: Give him the best chance possible at life.

Sarah got her 20-week ultrasound in October 2016. She and Mario were looking forward to find out the sex of their second child. But she could see in the technician’s eyes that something was wrong.

They were referred to a specialist in Madison. The eventual diagnosis: a cluster of congenital heart defects known as

As Sarah describes it, the left side of his heart didn’t fully form. Doctors offered a series of three open-heart surgeries to prepare him for a fourth: a heart transplant.

Bronson came into the world March 3, 2017, at SSM Health St. Mary’s Hospital-Madison. He was taken to American Family Children’s Hospital about six hours later and had his first heart procedure at 4 days old, Sarah said.

Bronson—named after UW-Madison basketball player Bronson Koenig, whose name caught Sarah’s fancy—was sent home at the end of April. Mario had left a job with a lawn-care company in Madison to be closer to their children—Bronson and Zoe, now 7.

A second surgery was set for August 2017, and in between, Bronson’s parents had to check his weight, oxygen levels and weigh his “ins and outs”: what he ate and drank and the products of what he ate and drank.

The second surgery meant another month in the hospital. The family was able to enjoy life for the next three years, Sarah said. There were plenty of checkups, but the only way anyone would know Bronson was not a normal child would be if they saw the scars on his chest.

He would jump off the couch and play with Zoe or on the swing set. He was always smiling or laughing, Sarah recalled: “He was your ideal, happy-go-lucky little 3-year-old.”

The third procedure was this August in Madison. It didn’t go as well. They transferred him in September to Milwaukee, where doctors recommended another surgery to install two tubes in his chest that led to a “ventricular assist device” that would relieve his heart and lungs of some of the work of breathing and pumping blood. The hope was to get him in condition to endure a transplant.

Then the stroke hit him as he was recovering Nov. 3. Doctors say he is no longer a good risk for a transplant. Sarah and Mario are holding onto hope that Bronson can make a comeback and become strong enough to handle a new heart.

The breakup

The stresses of caring for Bronson had a lot to do with why Sarah and Mario are not together anymore. They both say they remain very good friends. They open gifts as a family on Christmas.

“We co-parent wonderfully,” Sarah said. “We take the kids to the park, go out for dinners, have ice cream,” trying to keep things as normal as possible for the kids.

“I have the most respect for him. He’s a wonderful dad.”

The fighter

Through it all, Bronson’s capacity to fight has amazed his parents.

When Bronson moved from American Family Children’s Hospital in Madison at the beginning of October, his heart was deteriorating. Sluggish blood flow meant he couldn’t digest food properly.

“I sat with him one day that week as he vomited for four hours. I felt so helpless as he sat there and just threw up in my arms and in towels and buckets,” Mario recalled.

Bronson fell asleep afterward. He awoke in middle of the night, wanting to go for a walk after barely eating for 10 days.

“Seeing him want to get up and just walk and be active, that’s who he is,” Mario said.

Now, Bronson’s prospects are bleak. Friends comment online that they are praying for a miracle.

Sarah talks about the fight in him: “He is quite the little warrior. He’s been very resilient.”

“I don’t like surgery,” Bronson would say in his little-boy voice, his father recalled.

“He knows what surgery is. I used to tell him all the time, ‘We’re going to get you a new heart. You’re going to be like Iron Man. You’re going to start flying around.’ That’s the only way I could tell him what surgery was.”

The worst

The day after they got the news no parent wants to hear, Mario and Sarah were still sorting out the facts and their feelings.

Bronson can’t communicate. The part of his brain that would help him wake up was damaged.

“A time like this is absolutely insane,” Mario said. “No parent ever wants be put in this position.”

“It’s a devastating decision Mario and I have to make,” Sarah said. “We’re trying to stay positive and do what we think is best for Bronson and give him the best opportunities.”

Sarah said doctors have been very open and told them they can take their time. But it’s not just about their decision. Bronson needs to improve, or he’ll never be approved for what he needs to continue living: a new heart.

“But we’re going to keep chugging along,” Mario said. “My thing has always been, if he was done fighting he would’ve checked out a long time ago. He’s a fighter. He’s been fighting this stroke, you can tell, but I don’t know how much fight he has.

“He has surprised the hell out of me. He’s the strongest person I know.”